A long thought.

The older I get, the more I think like my mom. And this thing eventually came to my mind. Actually, I have been thinking bout it for a while, since last semester to be exact. It's has been a long thought, still contemplating on it, but I think I know what to do now.

Situation 1

At home, my mom doesn't particularly fond of the idea of me going out at night. If I'm going out to buy some groceries and stuff, or maybe on certain occasions, to breakfast with friends, then it's fine. With a curfew to meet of course. If not, then she will ask me macam2, then she'll say, tak payah la along, keluar esok pun boleh. Of course la, I wouldn't go out then. Unless it's a family dinner or my mom asks me to go out with her or something, I rarely go out at night when I'm at home.

Situation 2

Now lets talk about my life in Shah Alam. Been studying here for 2 years already. Currently in my 5th semester and I've been staying in my rented house since semester 2. Basically you have the idea of what living in a rented house is like, lagi2 when your parents are not living together with you. For the past semesters, I used to go out at night quite a number of times. Sometimes, I asked permission from my mum, sometimes I just didn't. Most of the time, I didn't. In her mind, she thinks I'll be staying at home during the night like I do when I'm at home, but actually I didn't. Yeah, I am that bad. But I didn't actually do wild wild things when I was having my night-out. There were among these choices; groceries shopping, 24-hour room, teman-ing my friends to go somewhere, or having my dinner which I did the most.

So, I've been thinking. My mum doesn't actually approve her girls going out at night when we the girls are at home and the rule applies everywhere we go. Because I'm so stupid and hard-headed before, I didn't think twice bout this particular thing and this explains my so many times night-outs. So I was thinking, what if  on the night I went out and I got myself into an accident, and she found out from my friends or whoever that person is, what would she feel when she finally knew that I actually went out at night, and didn't tell her at the first place that I wanted to? She'd be very disappointed I suppose. And sad. I don't want to lie to my parents, to my mum especially. Some people just don't care. Because this is "the freedom", they go out whenever they like, wherever they want, just because their parents are far at home. I used to be like that. I don't want to be like that anymore. I want to be a better daughter to my parents, a better kakak for my siblings, a better person to the society.

To cut it short, if my mum doesn't like it, then I won't do it. From now on, only if she allows me, only then I'll go out. Tu pun to go the library. Cukup lah I wasted so much of my time before. It's time to grow up.



P/S: I told you I think like an adult now.  Urgh. I feel so old already.